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Is SPAFA an Agency?
No, we are a support group for those interested in adoption. We support our members at every stage of the adoption journey, from getting started to post-placement to parenting. We do not endorse any particular agency or type of adoption.
Why should I join a support group like SPAFA?
- The biggest benefit is meeting people who have successfully completed one or more adoptions, which can go a long way in de-mystifying the adoption process. The availability of experienced adoptive parents, the access to agency representatives and other resources, can be invaluable to those not only starting the adoption process, but during "the wait."
- The openness to discuss and share adoption experiences and the emotional support offered can make the difference between feeling alone out there and feeling hopeful and confident.
- You and your child can also make lasting friendships.
Can I join SPAFA if I don't live in Charlotte?
Absolutely, we’d love to have you. Hopefully you live close enough to join us at some of our meetings and social events. If you cannot, or attending meetings and events isn't your thing, you can still get adoption information from our monthly newsletter, and access to the SPAFA discussion boards on our web site.
Why do you charge a fee to join SPAFA?
We charge an annual fee of $40 or $120 for 5 years. The majority of your membership fee is used to cover the costs related to events, meetings, educational resources.
What is offered at the meetings?
Each meeting has a theme. We offer 'getting started with adoption' seminars throughout the year. Check out the "Events" page of the web site for meeting topics.
Every meeting also provides networking time, allowing attendees to meet with adoption professionals and adoptive parents, who can share first-hand their adoption journey.
What are some tips for prospective adoptive families?
- Read and educate yourself! Always do your homework and look at the situation objectively.
- Join an adoption support group. It is always easier to tackle a project with the support of others.
- Prepare yourself and your family. Get ready for the transition of becoming a family or increasing your family size.
- Be forgiving of yourself. It is okay to get frustrated, stressed and emotional during the process.
- Remember to live your life. Take care of yourself, your relationships and have fun while you wait. Don't get so absorbed that you forget what you have today.
What is a home study?
The home study is an assessment and preparation process that a prospective family undergoes to determine, among other things, whether they are ready to parent a child and what type of child would best fit into the family. The home study is completed by a licensed social worker that must meet the requirements for the type of adoption you have chosen.
When do you do a home study?
Work with an adoption professional to determine when the home study needs to be completed, based on the type of adoption.
Do you have to be married and without children to adopt?
No. Single people, couples without children and families who already have children through birth or prior adoption can adopt. However, some agencies and foreign countries have specific requirements for the marital status, age, number of children or the religion of the individuals who adopt their children.
Why adopt domestically?
Some reasons are preference for a newborn, access to birthparent medical history, knowledge of birthparents and birthfamily, possible involvement during the pregnancy and birth, etc.
Why adopt internationally?
Being selected by a birth mother is not a concern with international adoption, adoption is completely private, connection to and/or admiration of a foreign culture, expenses are clearly defined up front, lower risk of adoption failure, etc.
What was your biggest fear about Domestic Adoption?
I was afraid that the birthmother would change her mind and decide to parent.
How did you overcome that fear?
You have to believe in your agency and that they have provided the resources the birthmother and her family need. You also have to believe that with adoption it is not an if, it is a when. There will be a child for you when the right situation is presented. If this birthfamily decides to parent, as hard as it will be on everyone involved, it is probably not the right child for you.
What is your biggest fear about International Adoption?
The general health and care of the infant prior to bringing him / her home.
How did you overcome that fear?
Open communication with the agency and by arranging a pre-adoption trip to meet the child prior to the completion of the adoption. Also, you can work with a state-side pediatrician to review a child's health documents.
What is Open Adoption?
Open adoption means that birthparents and adoptive parents have some knowledge about one another and can remain in contact throughout the child’s life. Open adoptions vary dramatically in terms of the degree of openness.
How do you know if the adoption professional or agency you are considering is reputable?
- Check with the state licensing office for licensing validation and complaints.
- Ask for references in your area that have both placed successfully and not placed successfully.
- Don't be afraid to ask questions about anything that's unclear or of concern.
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